In what would appear to be a total dichotomy to my last post…
it’s not always easy being positive.
Not every day. Because some days – or days piled on top of each
other – end up being the compilation of one glorious shitty day. The equivalent
being – it’s too much, enough is enough.
When you put your faith in something – a cause, a political
system, a country – and it all seems to be falling down… it’s hard to remain
positive. Worries about life as we know it, families, humanity, welfare – you know,
those 3AM thoughts that make sleep impossible and result in the walking dead
syndrome the next day.
I am a child of the 60’s. Granted I was too young to really
do any protesting (I was born in 1954) but I still consider myself a flower
child, a kid for peace. I still have the peace symbol earrings I wore in high
school.
I followed the Viet Nam War and Kent State and Woodstock and
Haight Ashbury all that was happening in that era really closely. JFK was
assassinated when I was 10 years old, Martin Luther King and RFK shortly after.
I was just a kid, but even then I felt things deeply.
But my sadness now isn’t all about politics and the tragic
road we are heading down. I feel a disappointment in things in general. Not all
the time, not every day but it will hit me out of the blue. I try to do my
best, to give back, to make a difference but sometimes it just seems futile. It
makes me question everything ~ like, what am I even doing.
I recently came upon a quote that spoke to me:
“It is both a
blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply.”
As I’m typing this my 16.5 year old cat, Kobie, is on my lap
with his head buried in the crook of my arm. Kobie is a very loving cat but has
never been a lap cat. In the last few weeks he has begged to be on my lap. It
is lovely but I truly sense he is telling me he’s slowing down; he wants the
comfort of my arms. He has a couple of serious health issues which we are handling
with medication, but it’s not necessarily anything that will get better.
It all has me searching for meaning. That sucks because at
70 years old I should have some answers by now.
It has been a week of remembrance, a week of heartbreaking tragedy. A week of “please do something before it’s too late” because the clock ...
Listen and silent are spelled with the same letters. I came from a big family of stoic Scandinavians. There wasn’t a lot of conversation an...
Ok. Here we go. New Year, New Blog. Why you ask? I don’t know. Maybe because I’m tired. I'm tired of the way social media is manipulati...